Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Could this be anxiety or am i just worrying to much?

So im not sure if this is anxiety or if i just over think to much, its hard to explain because some of the things that bother me are so macroscopic it really doesn't make sense. like when i drive down this one highway in my town you can't get any radio signal so i started looking around to find any type of mile markers or signs that were around when it did this and when it stopped. AND I FOUND THEM, theres this sign that says favorlen or something and right after i pass it my radio cuts out. and theres another one about 3 to 4 minutes down that road and when i pass it my radio signal works again and i keep thinking there doing something over there thats blocking out radio signals. Also at my job we have cameras everywhere because its a very very big place. And i'm always thinking that they all have there eyes on me and i sometimes do this thing where i end up giving myself a headache but i will look around a lot swinging my head one way to another then i start to think that the customers are undercover people from one of are other stores coming to spy on me and tell my manager if i don't do my job right. and later in my yearly evaluations i find out i'm one of there best workers. or if a guy comes up and hits on me and lets me know hes interested in me i tend to freak out then later on i think that there stocking me and i go far out of my way to get home like go three miles the opposite way of my house just to go home for the night. and when i leave a bar i park at my friends house till morning then go home. or when im home i think people i know like my boyfriend are driving by every few hours. or even when i go into work i always notice when they change things around and i have to sit there and figure out what it is thats different or i wont stop thinking about it. and my boyfriend is a C.O at a jail and works very crazy and odd hours and his shifts are always changing day to nights and every time the shift change happens i think that hes doing something or hes become sick of me and is making up reasons not to see me, then i always make him pist off for thinking that when he really does nothing wrong to me and he treats me like a princess. i could go on and on with more stores that are some what the same and Ive been really thinking of going to a doctor about this because this what ever it is, is really really f-in up my life all the way around. but i wanted some incite on other people that may be going threw this also or no what may be going on with me.

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